I haven't really been craving a lot. Really nothing, actually, but I like to use it as an excuse with Chris sometimes.. haha. Except for TCBY. I'll take that cup of heaven anytime... YUM.
BUT for the past 3 weeks, all I've been wanting are Jello Pudding Pops! I cannot think of anything else, and I can't find them anywhere!!! The Randalls by my house that closed last year sold them and I only bought them once, (although I ate the entire box in 4 days) but now I can't find them anywhere! I know that everyone remembers them, you can't not. Seriously. Remember how there was that crunchy icy layer on the outside? THAT'S what I want. Well, that followed by 18 pudding pops.
So please, I am begging you! If you find yourself at HEB, Randalls, Walmart, etc and find them PLEASE let me know!
Until then.... I'll just be eating my regular popsicles. They're good too, but don't have the icy layer.
Edit- Ok, so because of my mad Googling skillz, I found a store locator and it turns out that the only place in Austin that is now carrying them is the Randalls on Bee Caves. So... tomorrow.. I'll be venturing to South Austin! Yippee!
Monday, May 29, 2006
Saturday, May 20, 2006
The Start of my Insanity
I'm not a crier. I'm really not. I didn't even well up at the wedding and I was 8 weeks pregnant. It's not that I don't enjoy a good eye swelling cry every once in a while, but the opportunity never really presents itself. Except for now. I'm now 12 weeks pregnant, and my eyes well up at the dumbest things. The Applebee's commercial where the local high school football team loses and the restaurant stays open just for them. I well up. Country songs where people have cancer. Tears. Random acts of kindness. Puffy eyes.
What do I NOT cry at? The 2 hour heart wrenching season finale of Greys Anatomy. Dogs are being put to sleep, people are dying, crying, it's terrible. Watched all 2 hours with a straight face, eating a popsicle. (Which I eat about 5 of per night.. totally another story)
What DO I cry at? Wheel of Fortune where the college girl wins $100,000 at the end by solving a tough puzzle. (Cue record scratching.... ) WHAT? Yes.
I think that it's all downhill from here. Can't wait, what's next?
What do I NOT cry at? The 2 hour heart wrenching season finale of Greys Anatomy. Dogs are being put to sleep, people are dying, crying, it's terrible. Watched all 2 hours with a straight face, eating a popsicle. (Which I eat about 5 of per night.. totally another story)
What DO I cry at? Wheel of Fortune where the college girl wins $100,000 at the end by solving a tough puzzle. (Cue record scratching.... ) WHAT? Yes.
I think that it's all downhill from here. Can't wait, what's next?
Tuesday, May 09, 2006
Awkward Jr.?
Because of my big mouth, most people know but on or around December 1, 2006 there will be an Awkward Jr.! That's right, I drank the punch. Surprised? Me too! But it's starting to sink in. Now that the wedding is over with, I am starting to get excited about it. I am currently 10 weeks along and will have my first ultrasound on Monday, May 15. That is when we'll hear the heartbeat for the first time. A friend of mine told me about this theory that the bpm is related to the sex of the baby. Not sure how true it is, but my luck is it will be somewhere in the middle so that it won't apply to me anyway.
It's really weird to think that right now I have something growing inside of me. Besides gas, I mean. Don't even get me started on that part, I could blow your mind. (No pun intended) But that's another story for another day. Well, probably not. I might just stop there and not tell you all about the reason that Chris cries himself to sleep at night.
So, yes, this little drinker is on hiatus until she doesn't feel guilty about drinking herself to sleep in front of the baby. Just kidding... But I really wish that virgin margaritas were possible. Mockaritas? Man, I crack myself up.
It's really weird to think that right now I have something growing inside of me. Besides gas, I mean. Don't even get me started on that part, I could blow your mind. (No pun intended) But that's another story for another day. Well, probably not. I might just stop there and not tell you all about the reason that Chris cries himself to sleep at night.
So, yes, this little drinker is on hiatus until she doesn't feel guilty about drinking herself to sleep in front of the baby. Just kidding... But I really wish that virgin margaritas were possible. Mockaritas? Man, I crack myself up.
Monday, March 13, 2006
Need a Laugh? Try Me!
I always joke around and say that I'm that awkward person that all weird things happen to. Not always bad, but just weird. Humorous usually. It's like I never really got past that clumsy stage in life.
I'm getting married in roughly a month and a half. I think that for the most part, I'm pretty prepared. Sort of. There are tons of little bitty details that I still need to iron out and that just takes the time and energy which I seem to be lacking lately. I sent out the invitations a few weeks ago, and one of the little details that I so proudly had taken care of were the hotel arrangements for our out of town guests. Since I worked in the hotel industry for 6 years or so, this was the one thing that I sort of knew what to do about. I slipped an insert into each of the invitations with the details of the hotel block and rate info. I made one slight oversight. When I typed the toll free numbers for each of the hotels, I accidentally put 800 instead of 866 for one of the hotels. Normally, you would just think "Hey, it's a simple mistype! Not a big deal! It's okay!" But you know what? It WOULD be okay, but only if the 800 number that I sent to all of my friends and family wasn't a porn line.
That's right folks, this lucky girl sent all of her friends and family information so that they would call a number and have a breathy girl talk about "young horny sluts" while sounding like she's having an orgasm. This could ONLY happen to me. Only to me, would all of my Dad's cousins (whom I have only met a handful of times) call to make hotel reservations and end up calling a sex line.
See what I mean?
**Edit**
Eric was kind enough (?) to transcribe the message for me:
"Want to get with the sluttiest girls your nasty imagination can dream up? Errrrr. We can be what ever you want us to be baby, after all it is your fantasy and we live to make it real. Whether you want to take us spread eagle on the bed or while we're on our hands and knees, me and my ultra hot girlfriends will do what ever it takes to pleasure you After entering your credit card you'll be able to chose from the following options...
Nice.... very nice, Katie...
I'm getting married in roughly a month and a half. I think that for the most part, I'm pretty prepared. Sort of. There are tons of little bitty details that I still need to iron out and that just takes the time and energy which I seem to be lacking lately. I sent out the invitations a few weeks ago, and one of the little details that I so proudly had taken care of were the hotel arrangements for our out of town guests. Since I worked in the hotel industry for 6 years or so, this was the one thing that I sort of knew what to do about. I slipped an insert into each of the invitations with the details of the hotel block and rate info. I made one slight oversight. When I typed the toll free numbers for each of the hotels, I accidentally put 800 instead of 866 for one of the hotels. Normally, you would just think "Hey, it's a simple mistype! Not a big deal! It's okay!" But you know what? It WOULD be okay, but only if the 800 number that I sent to all of my friends and family wasn't a porn line.
That's right folks, this lucky girl sent all of her friends and family information so that they would call a number and have a breathy girl talk about "young horny sluts" while sounding like she's having an orgasm. This could ONLY happen to me. Only to me, would all of my Dad's cousins (whom I have only met a handful of times) call to make hotel reservations and end up calling a sex line.
See what I mean?
**Edit**
Eric was kind enough (?) to transcribe the message for me:
"Want to get with the sluttiest girls your nasty imagination can dream up? Errrrr. We can be what ever you want us to be baby, after all it is your fantasy and we live to make it real. Whether you want to take us spread eagle on the bed or while we're on our hands and knees, me and my ultra hot girlfriends will do what ever it takes to pleasure you After entering your credit card you'll be able to chose from the following options...
Nice.... very nice, Katie...
Tuesday, January 31, 2006
My Birthday Rocked!
I know it's a little late (yeah, like 3 weeks ago) but my birthday was a blast this year! Many of you know how clumsy and awkward I am (mostly clumsy) so you know how I ran into a pole with a brown stain on the butt of my dress last year and then won that stuff for making an ass out of myself on the radio afterwards. Because I'm stupid and clumsy. Well, you know that stupidity and clumsiness apparently pay off. One of the prizes that I won was a stretch limo for 6 hours. We're way too old to ride around in a limo for 6 hours, hanging out the sunroof so instead we did a wine tour of Texas... nothing like starting the booze cruise at 10am! Jackie, Todd, Chris, Alma and I rode out to Fredericksburg and picked up Nina and Kevin, who were visiting from the valley for their 2nd wedding anniversary. (Or 1st? Not sure BECAUSE I WASN'T INVITED. It's okay, we lost touch, I just wanted to rub it in.) Anyway, so we packed up the vodka, OJ and champagne and made a mini road trip out of it. Sooooo... after 3 wineries and 6 hours we were all sufficiently drunk enough to start my birthday day off with a bang! Not that I need to get drunk to have a good time, anyone that knows me knows that I'm always willing to make an ass out of myself for a few laughs.
So later that night we went to Berry Hill for dinner and drinks. Mmmm... they have awesome margaritas and tacos.. I felt kind of bad because I didn't really get to talk to everyone, I feel like it went by so fast. After dinner some of us headed out downtown to meet Eric and his crew. Man oh man, I always have a blast with those guys! We did shot after shot after shot.. I didn't even drink the entire big beer that I had ordered. Tacho was there with some chick with crazy hair and a scary animal print dress of some sort. A friend of theirs apparently has some history with Tacho so we talked shit about his date all night. That was fun. Sometimes I love talking shit about people I don't know... ahh, good times. Apparently at some point in the night I decided that Chris wasn't having a good time (He didn't feel so well after having been drinking all day) so I think that I did some Supastar thing, like the 90's SNL Molly Shannon character. Don't know why... oh yeah, because I'd had 64 shots.
Anyway, long of the short of it, I had an awesome birthday! Thank you to everyone that made it so much fun!!!
Monday, January 23, 2006
Balloon Butt
So, being the procrastinator that I've never denied being, I am finally dieting and exercising. You might try to humor me and say "Why Katie, you look great, you don't need to do a thing" (Doesn't matter what you actually say, I'm going to hear that by the way) But who are we kidding? In the past 2 1/2 years that Chris and I have been dating, I've gained about 17 lbs. To many, that's not much. To a 5'2" elf, that's an ass and a half. I've been talking about losing weight for about 2 years now, but haven't done. Instead, I've gone out for many happy hours, eaten many cheeseburgers and indulged in many wing and beer nights. And by exercising, I sit on the couch and think about running. Or I'll watch 8 minute abs. Just watch it. And laugh, I might add. Guys in striped leotards are funny.
Getting back to the subject at hand... So, 2 weeks ago, at my final dress fitting for the wedding dress that I will not be wearing (that's for another story, to come shortly) a very embarassing thing happened. The russian woman that was helping me into my dress couldn't button the back. I was wearing one of those girdle bras, sucking in, and pushing my waist in. All at once. And it barely closed. Man, oh man... then when it was on and strapped up, I realized how much I needed to get serious. So, for the past two weeks I've been lean cuisine-ing it, and for the first time in my life... I joined a gym. I joined Gold's Gym last week.
Anyway, my point is that I've lost about 7 lbs so far and I'm on my way. Whoopee!
Getting back to the subject at hand... So, 2 weeks ago, at my final dress fitting for the wedding dress that I will not be wearing (that's for another story, to come shortly) a very embarassing thing happened. The russian woman that was helping me into my dress couldn't button the back. I was wearing one of those girdle bras, sucking in, and pushing my waist in. All at once. And it barely closed. Man, oh man... then when it was on and strapped up, I realized how much I needed to get serious. So, for the past two weeks I've been lean cuisine-ing it, and for the first time in my life... I joined a gym. I joined Gold's Gym last week.
Anyway, my point is that I've lost about 7 lbs so far and I'm on my way. Whoopee!
Sunday, December 25, 2005
MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!
That's pretty much all I wanted to say. I'm in Pampa right now, laughing at Chris because he and his cousins stayed up until 4am last night and now he's hurting. Hahahaha!!! Serves him right, he snored loudly and slept diagonally last night. All night. In a full sized bed. It was not fun. So, once again, HA HA HA HA HAAAA!!!
Monday, November 28, 2005
Pictures from Allison's Wedding
I'm going to use one of these for the Save the Date magnets. Which one is best?
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
Yum! I Taste Christmas in Every Sip!
I'm sooo excited!!! Even in our 80 degree weather, It's starting to feel like Christmas! Why, you ask? Because Starbucks recently busted out the gingerbread lattes! Yayyyy! I'm sure that they have the egg nog ones, too, but the gingerbread are my favorites! Every year I am broke around Christmas time, but not because I buy so many presents for people, but because I drink these about every single day. It's so worth it. Mmmm... They put whipped cream on top so when you sip it, you get a that sweet whipped cream, then the spicy gingerbread and the espresso. Only problem is, if you don't drink it fast enough the whipped cream melts, then if you look inside you see little fat bubbles floating on top. Then it's kind of gross, but hey, it's just a small price to pay for that gingerbread goodness.....
Friday, October 14, 2005
Something Stupid Said to me Today
I was sitting at my desk today minding my own business (For once) and the phone rang. A customer was telling me that a company that she used to have an account with was still billing her the $5 monthly charge for her account. I know that we closed this account for her 7 months ago, and she's not using them anymore, she's using who we use now, which is ABC Company. She said that every month she sends the old company an email telling them that her account is closed, please refund her this money. Month after month this happens. Finally yesterday she called them and spoke with a manager and explained to him that she used to have an account, but now she uses Norply and to stop billing her. I kept thinking "Who in the hell is Norply? What a name!" So she went on and on, and finally I told her "Ma'am, you don't use Norply for this, you use ABC Company." She gave me a loud exasperated sigh and told me "Uh, yes, I know. The emailed statements that I receive monthly come from Norply at ABC Company!" It took me a while, but I realized... noreply@abccompany. NO REPLY. I kindly explained to her that the company was named ABC Company and the address was probably from an unattended mailbox. Then I ran around my office and told everyone.
I can't make this stuff up, I'm not that good. I swear.
I can't make this stuff up, I'm not that good. I swear.
Thursday, October 06, 2005
Tuesday, October 04, 2005
One of Those Weird Questionnaires That Someone Sent Me
I never actually respond to these, and I still don't want to, but I guess I will post it here.
1. Time of starting this?
5:01pm
2. Were you named after anyone?
Not that I know of, I'm told the my dad always wanted a girl named Katie.
3. Do you wish on stars? Nope.
4. When did you last cry?
Last week I started to, does that count?
5. Do you like your handwriting?
Nope. I write like a boy.
6. What is your favorite meat?
Hard to say... a good steak is always the best.
7. What is your most embarrassing CD on your shelf?
Ryan Cabrera. Wow, I can't believe I'm telling people about that one.
8. If you were another person, would YOU be friends> with you?
I'd like to think so.
9. Are you a daredevil? Not sure, I've never really been put in a situation that would make me think that I am. Or am not.
10. How do you release anger?
I take a walk, stew over it and mentally scream at random people and little kids for being in my way. Wow.... maybe I wouldn't want to be my own friend
11. Where is your second home?
My second home? I kind of wish that I liked my job enough to call it my second home... I have no idea
12. Do you trust others easily?
I trust people until they give me a reason not to, unless they just seem pretty shady to begin with.
13. What was your favourite toy as a child?
Strawberry Shortcake... come to think of it, she's still my favorite!
14. What class in school do you think is totally useless?
Ummm... actually they all helped in their own way. Even P.E., I mean, that's where I mastered badminton...
15. Have you ever been in a mosh pit?
I don't think so. I'm a little small for that.
16. What do you look for in a guy/girl?
Well, first of all he has to like women. You know, instead of men. After that comes personality, straight teeth, clear skin and he has to have a little meat on his bones. I'm not into the skinny guys, you know. They make me look fat.
17. Would you bungee jump?
Sure, why not
18. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
Yeah, I try to steer clear of shoes with laces. They're tough.
19. What's your favourite ice cream flavour?
Well normally it's Ben & Jerry's Dublin Mudslide. MMmmmmm... but Ben, Jerry & I are not on speaking terms at the moment. Thanks to those two I have a little too much junk in the trunk. So, for now, it's water flavored ice cream.. also known as ice.
20. What are your favourite colours?
Crimson is my favorite color.
21. What is your least favorite thing?
People who drive slow, talk slow, walk slow and don't like my jokes. They're the worst
22. What do you miss most right now?
Being a millionaire... oh wait....
23. What colour underwear are you wearing?
I'd like to use the cliche' "I'm not wearing any", but that's really not comfortable. So I'm actually wearing rose colored saran wrap. Much better.
24. What are you listening to right now?
I'm watching a terrible movie called "A Lot Like Love". It's really pretty bad. Chris should not let me pick out movies anymore.
25. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Smile
26. How are you today?
Doing well. We tasted wedding cakes today, so I'm actually doing great
27. Favourite drink?
At the moment, it's a flirtini from Cuba Libre.
28. Favourite alcoholic drink?
What? Are favorite drink and favorite alcoholic drink not the same? Doesn't everyone drink alcohol in every single drink?
29. Wear contacts?
Nope
30. Siblings?
Two pretty cool brothers. Of course, they have their sister to thank for their coolness...
31. Favorite month?
April. It's one of the only really pretty months, weatherwise.
32. Favorite food?
Ooooh, favorite food... hard to say, but Mandina's Turtle Soup isn't half bad. But neither is a muffaletta from Napolean House, or Dad's gumbo, or Mom's spaghetti... man, that is cruel to make someone choose just one!
33. Last movie you watched?
Again, that crappy "A Lot Like Love"
34. Favorite day of the year?
My birthday. I love when things are all about me!
35. Have you ever been too shy to ask someone out?
I guess so, but I really can't remember the last time I asked a guy out. Not because I'm trying to do the fake "Oh, it's been so long since I've been out on a date with anyone but Chris", but really it's because I'm so incredibly beautiful, you know? Hahaahhaaaa!!! Gotcha!
36. Scary movies or happy endings?
Happy endings. As long as the movie doesn't suck like the one I'm watching now.
37. Summer or winter?
Summer. But before the weather gets to be 100 degrees. Or more.
38. Hugs or kisses?
Hugs
39. What book/magazine are you reading?
In Her Shoes. So far it's really good.
40. What's on your mouse pad?
Right now I'm using the sofa as a mousepad, so I guess that means that there are stripes on my mousepad
41. What did you watch on TV last night?
Kitchen Confidential and Grey's Anatomy from Sunday night.
42. Favorite Smell?
You know what they say, everyone likes their own bouquet... haha, just kidding, I know that's gross. My favorite smell is garlic and onions cooking in olive oil. I know, I'm weird. Bouquet sounds much better though, huh?
43. Do you regret ever breaking up with someone?
Nope. I just wish I could see what some people are doing now.
44. Time of finishing? 5:57pm. Hey, I had to have some time to watch the crappy movie to know that it's crappy!
1. Time of starting this?
5:01pm
2. Were you named after anyone?
Not that I know of, I'm told the my dad always wanted a girl named Katie.
3. Do you wish on stars? Nope.
4. When did you last cry?
Last week I started to, does that count?
5. Do you like your handwriting?
Nope. I write like a boy.
6. What is your favorite meat?
Hard to say... a good steak is always the best.
7. What is your most embarrassing CD on your shelf?
Ryan Cabrera. Wow, I can't believe I'm telling people about that one.
8. If you were another person, would YOU be friends> with you?
I'd like to think so.
9. Are you a daredevil? Not sure, I've never really been put in a situation that would make me think that I am. Or am not.
10. How do you release anger?
I take a walk, stew over it and mentally scream at random people and little kids for being in my way. Wow.... maybe I wouldn't want to be my own friend
11. Where is your second home?
My second home? I kind of wish that I liked my job enough to call it my second home... I have no idea
12. Do you trust others easily?
I trust people until they give me a reason not to, unless they just seem pretty shady to begin with.
13. What was your favourite toy as a child?
Strawberry Shortcake... come to think of it, she's still my favorite!
14. What class in school do you think is totally useless?
Ummm... actually they all helped in their own way. Even P.E., I mean, that's where I mastered badminton...
15. Have you ever been in a mosh pit?
I don't think so. I'm a little small for that.
16. What do you look for in a guy/girl?
Well, first of all he has to like women. You know, instead of men. After that comes personality, straight teeth, clear skin and he has to have a little meat on his bones. I'm not into the skinny guys, you know. They make me look fat.
17. Would you bungee jump?
Sure, why not
18. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off?
Yeah, I try to steer clear of shoes with laces. They're tough.
19. What's your favourite ice cream flavour?
Well normally it's Ben & Jerry's Dublin Mudslide. MMmmmmm... but Ben, Jerry & I are not on speaking terms at the moment. Thanks to those two I have a little too much junk in the trunk. So, for now, it's water flavored ice cream.. also known as ice.
20. What are your favourite colours?
Crimson is my favorite color.
21. What is your least favorite thing?
People who drive slow, talk slow, walk slow and don't like my jokes. They're the worst
22. What do you miss most right now?
Being a millionaire... oh wait....
23. What colour underwear are you wearing?
I'd like to use the cliche' "I'm not wearing any", but that's really not comfortable. So I'm actually wearing rose colored saran wrap. Much better.
24. What are you listening to right now?
I'm watching a terrible movie called "A Lot Like Love". It's really pretty bad. Chris should not let me pick out movies anymore.
25. The first thing you notice about the opposite sex?
Smile
26. How are you today?
Doing well. We tasted wedding cakes today, so I'm actually doing great
27. Favourite drink?
At the moment, it's a flirtini from Cuba Libre.
28. Favourite alcoholic drink?
What? Are favorite drink and favorite alcoholic drink not the same? Doesn't everyone drink alcohol in every single drink?
29. Wear contacts?
Nope
30. Siblings?
Two pretty cool brothers. Of course, they have their sister to thank for their coolness...
31. Favorite month?
April. It's one of the only really pretty months, weatherwise.
32. Favorite food?
Ooooh, favorite food... hard to say, but Mandina's Turtle Soup isn't half bad. But neither is a muffaletta from Napolean House, or Dad's gumbo, or Mom's spaghetti... man, that is cruel to make someone choose just one!
33. Last movie you watched?
Again, that crappy "A Lot Like Love"
34. Favorite day of the year?
My birthday. I love when things are all about me!
35. Have you ever been too shy to ask someone out?
I guess so, but I really can't remember the last time I asked a guy out. Not because I'm trying to do the fake "Oh, it's been so long since I've been out on a date with anyone but Chris", but really it's because I'm so incredibly beautiful, you know? Hahaahhaaaa!!! Gotcha!
36. Scary movies or happy endings?
Happy endings. As long as the movie doesn't suck like the one I'm watching now.
37. Summer or winter?
Summer. But before the weather gets to be 100 degrees. Or more.
38. Hugs or kisses?
Hugs
39. What book/magazine are you reading?
In Her Shoes. So far it's really good.
40. What's on your mouse pad?
Right now I'm using the sofa as a mousepad, so I guess that means that there are stripes on my mousepad
41. What did you watch on TV last night?
Kitchen Confidential and Grey's Anatomy from Sunday night.
42. Favorite Smell?
You know what they say, everyone likes their own bouquet... haha, just kidding, I know that's gross. My favorite smell is garlic and onions cooking in olive oil. I know, I'm weird. Bouquet sounds much better though, huh?
43. Do you regret ever breaking up with someone?
Nope. I just wish I could see what some people are doing now.
44. Time of finishing? 5:57pm. Hey, I had to have some time to watch the crappy movie to know that it's crappy!
Friday, September 30, 2005
To My Fellow Austinites....
I only have one simple request of you, my fellow Austinites. If you must get into any kind of a car accident, can you please please please do it when I'm not a) On my way to work, or b) on my way home from work. That would really really make my life a lot easier.
You see, when you wreck into another vehicle in the morning, say, between the hours of 7am-8am (or even 8:30am on a bad day...) or anytime in the afternoon before 6pm, then it really puts a damper on my day.
So really, if you could just schedule these on weekends only. And maybe just on the south side of town, that would much appreciated.
Thanks.
You see, when you wreck into another vehicle in the morning, say, between the hours of 7am-8am (or even 8:30am on a bad day...) or anytime in the afternoon before 6pm, then it really puts a damper on my day.
So really, if you could just schedule these on weekends only. And maybe just on the south side of town, that would much appreciated.
Thanks.
Tuesday, September 27, 2005
My Scary Day
Today was one of the scariest days of my life. So far.
I got a call after a meeting this morning from my fiance. Actually, I got 6 calls and 2 emails. He never wants to talk to me that much, so I knew that something was really wrong. After a few semi-frantic calls and voicemails, he finally called me back. He was having a really bad panic attack. I've never had one and he hadn't either, but at first I didn't think much of it. He told me about how he was feeling, what happened, etc.. and sounded pretty scared. I've never ever heard nor seen him scared so I went home to check him out. Um, and not the "freak show" kind of check him out, just the "Oh God, I hope he's just being dramatic" kind of check him out. On the way home (yes, I talked on the phone while I was driving. The whole way.) I called my older brother, whom I think has had an anxiety attack and/or panic attack (same thing, or not?) and couldn't get an answer. I called my best friend, and she gave me some advice, I called my dad and he finally told me that if it's that bad to take him to a doctor or to the ER.
When I got home, I found him on the couch. He didn't look good. It was so awful to see him like that. It scared me because I've never seen him out of control. I convinced him to go to the hospital with me. We spent 4 hours in the ER. The whole time we were there he was going between sweating, numbness in face and hands, his heart was beating fast, etc..
I know that he loves me. I've never doubted that, but he's really not the affectionate type. Getting a hug is like pulling teeth. We don't hold hands that often, and he never initiates it. It's not bad, it's just him. I'm naturally an affectionate person. I grew up with lots of hugs and kisses and I'm used to it. I crave a really good hug, it's just me.
Anyone ever seen that Sex and the City episode where Big comes back into town for an angioplasty and Carrie comes to the hotel to be with him? For the first time ever he shows her that he needs her. He tells her basically that he wants to grow old with her. Then the next morning he's back to his old self again. Anyone?
So, this just reminded me of that episode. When we walked into the hospital, he took my hand and basically didn't let go for the next 3 hours. Even though I knew that he was going to be okay, it was so incredibly scary to see this guy that since day once I've thought of as this He-Man to be completely human and helpless. He's the guy that I rely on to ground me when I get to be the panicked crazy drama queen. I know what we have and I know how much he loves me, but we're so comfortable with each other we just don't show it sometimes, I guess. For those 3 hours in the hospital, I was his everything. I didn't let go of his hand, I got him blankets, he looked at me like I've rarely seen. I actually saw it. I know how scared he was, and even though I knew he was going to be fine, I know how scared I was.
He's going to be fine, and I know this. But the moment that I realized, for the first time ever, that he needed me, I'll never forget. It's the most amazing feeling.
I got a call after a meeting this morning from my fiance. Actually, I got 6 calls and 2 emails. He never wants to talk to me that much, so I knew that something was really wrong. After a few semi-frantic calls and voicemails, he finally called me back. He was having a really bad panic attack. I've never had one and he hadn't either, but at first I didn't think much of it. He told me about how he was feeling, what happened, etc.. and sounded pretty scared. I've never ever heard nor seen him scared so I went home to check him out. Um, and not the "freak show" kind of check him out, just the "Oh God, I hope he's just being dramatic" kind of check him out. On the way home (yes, I talked on the phone while I was driving. The whole way.) I called my older brother, whom I think has had an anxiety attack and/or panic attack (same thing, or not?) and couldn't get an answer. I called my best friend, and she gave me some advice, I called my dad and he finally told me that if it's that bad to take him to a doctor or to the ER.
When I got home, I found him on the couch. He didn't look good. It was so awful to see him like that. It scared me because I've never seen him out of control. I convinced him to go to the hospital with me. We spent 4 hours in the ER. The whole time we were there he was going between sweating, numbness in face and hands, his heart was beating fast, etc..
I know that he loves me. I've never doubted that, but he's really not the affectionate type. Getting a hug is like pulling teeth. We don't hold hands that often, and he never initiates it. It's not bad, it's just him. I'm naturally an affectionate person. I grew up with lots of hugs and kisses and I'm used to it. I crave a really good hug, it's just me.
Anyone ever seen that Sex and the City episode where Big comes back into town for an angioplasty and Carrie comes to the hotel to be with him? For the first time ever he shows her that he needs her. He tells her basically that he wants to grow old with her. Then the next morning he's back to his old self again. Anyone?
So, this just reminded me of that episode. When we walked into the hospital, he took my hand and basically didn't let go for the next 3 hours. Even though I knew that he was going to be okay, it was so incredibly scary to see this guy that since day once I've thought of as this He-Man to be completely human and helpless. He's the guy that I rely on to ground me when I get to be the panicked crazy drama queen. I know what we have and I know how much he loves me, but we're so comfortable with each other we just don't show it sometimes, I guess. For those 3 hours in the hospital, I was his everything. I didn't let go of his hand, I got him blankets, he looked at me like I've rarely seen. I actually saw it. I know how scared he was, and even though I knew he was going to be fine, I know how scared I was.
He's going to be fine, and I know this. But the moment that I realized, for the first time ever, that he needed me, I'll never forget. It's the most amazing feeling.
Friday, September 16, 2005
News Alert: I'm Getting MARRIED. What????
Even though I've been engaged for 5 months now, and we have been living together for over a year, it's just hit me. I'm getting married. I'm getting married in 7 months. Oh My God. Don't get me wrong, I'm ecstatic, but now I constantly have these weird dreams about the wedding. They're awful. A few weeks ago I dreamed that it was the day of the wedding, we show up at the reception, the caterer is there, but there's no food. The caterer then informs me that I forgot to book them and he's just there to tell me about it. What a guy. So I then have to go to the grocery store, but I changed out of my dress and into a tshirt and shorts, but with pantyhose on, and order sandwich trays. The girl at the counter doesn't believe that this is really happening to me so I prove it to her by showing her that I have pantyhose on. Apparently, that does it. So she is now trying to convince me to buy crab claws and wants me to try them first. So, I'm at the grocery store, and trying to crack open a crab claw (because she couldn't crack it for me for whatever reason) with these weird looking boiled shrimp all around me. I woke up in a panic and called the caterer the next morning. We are absolutely not having seafood at the wedding.
Then last night, I had this dream that I forgot to book the church. We show up, I realize my mistake, so they let us turn a normal Sunday mass into my wedding ceremony. All of these people stood up, gave me dirty looks, and left. Just walked out of church. I then realized what I was wearing. A dress, hideous and very different from the one that I've bought, and a big white straw sunhat. Yeah, I know. But this part kept repeating over and over, all with different outcomes. Another time, I forgot to book the church, but so did about 3 other girls, so we were all in our dresses and had this weird big ceremony on Sunday morning with people walking out and the priest scolding us and telling us that we should really be more prepared next time. Next time???
My dreams never make sense. This is getting ridiculous. We may just have to go to Vegas.
Then last night, I had this dream that I forgot to book the church. We show up, I realize my mistake, so they let us turn a normal Sunday mass into my wedding ceremony. All of these people stood up, gave me dirty looks, and left. Just walked out of church. I then realized what I was wearing. A dress, hideous and very different from the one that I've bought, and a big white straw sunhat. Yeah, I know. But this part kept repeating over and over, all with different outcomes. Another time, I forgot to book the church, but so did about 3 other girls, so we were all in our dresses and had this weird big ceremony on Sunday morning with people walking out and the priest scolding us and telling us that we should really be more prepared next time. Next time???
My dreams never make sense. This is getting ridiculous. We may just have to go to Vegas.
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
My Fun Weekend in Kerrville, TX
I had to go to Kerrville, TX this past weekend for a trade show. This place is so Texas that it's scary. EVERYTHING is covered in cream gravy, people say "pah" instead of "pie", and they call everyone "darlin'". The best thing was the hotel. It was modeled after this ranch in Texas, which apparently is famous but I had never heard of it. The entire hotel was filled with dead animals. I'm not talking about a couple of deer heads scattered about, I'm talking like in the middle of the lobby was this massive bear, and on one side there were giraffes. I was thoroughly grossed out. So, like I always do when I'm uncomfortable, I got drunk.
The association that was hosting the show put together a reception, which included a few hors d'oeuvres, a keg of beer (which was free) and a couple of bottles of cheap wine (which was not free). So my coworkers and I decided to camp out near the free beer and try to entertain ourselves. That was fine for awhile, but we're really not that interesting. We came to the conclusion that beer alone was not going to get us through this conference so we spent the next 4 hours in the hotel bar.
Now, I don't have a whole lot of talents, but something that I've always been able to do is to chum up to people and get free drinks. It's not because I'm really cute, I think it's because I'm always willing to make an ass out of myself for a few laughs. I don't know exactly what I did that night, but we got lots of free shots out of it.
At least this place didn't take our sense of humor...
The association that was hosting the show put together a reception, which included a few hors d'oeuvres, a keg of beer (which was free) and a couple of bottles of cheap wine (which was not free). So my coworkers and I decided to camp out near the free beer and try to entertain ourselves. That was fine for awhile, but we're really not that interesting. We came to the conclusion that beer alone was not going to get us through this conference so we spent the next 4 hours in the hotel bar.
Now, I don't have a whole lot of talents, but something that I've always been able to do is to chum up to people and get free drinks. It's not because I'm really cute, I think it's because I'm always willing to make an ass out of myself for a few laughs. I don't know exactly what I did that night, but we got lots of free shots out of it.
At least this place didn't take our sense of humor...
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